Life has taught me many lessons and they have come in many forms, such as pain, disappointments, successes and failures. Most of all, life has taught me how to be fearless and unapologetic about who I am and where I am in life. I believe that my best days are before me and God is always beside me, so how could life not come full circle.
You simply have to believe and know that life will always meet you where you are and that a greater force, known as God, will forever create a path for you. However, you must take the time to learn from all the situations you are placed in and align yourself with God daily.
I’ve learned that in order to beat the odds in life you must always take the road less traveled, learn how to be alone without being lonely because that is the only way you will build your foundation and your relationship with God. A part of life’s journey is to figure out who you are, so you can confidently advocate for yourself and the things in life that are best for you.
Thadine and her daughter Azaria
I would say my journey seriously began at age of 22. I became a mother, I was not married, I was a new college graduate, and I did not get my dream marketing job. Nothing that I had envisioned or expected was coming to pass. After a few years of working and not feeling fulfilled I decided that I would have to restructure my life, I knew I was settling and I didn’t want to settle anymore. I knew there were greater opportunities out there for me to obtain. I would need to be fearless at this point in my life in order to create the change that was necessary for my growth. There were three things I decided to do: buy a house, go to graduate school, and move back in with my parents. Moving back home at the age of 26 was not ideal but it was the necessary steps I needed to take to propel me to the next level.
With determination and discipline at the age of 29 and as a single mom, I completed my Master’s degree, I bought a single-family home and I was now in a well-paid corporate position. I was building general wealth for myself and my daughter and God was meeting me in each direction. When I was making sacrifice’s, he was preparing me and opening doors for me. But great rewards can also come with struggles and pain. Two months before I closed on my home, my daughter’s father died unexpectedly. He was my first love, someone who I shared a child with and now he was gone. This was one of the hardest moments in my life. I woke up on days when I didn’t want to, I smiled when simply just wanted to cry and I pushed through because that was the only thing I knew how to do. Processing this pain took years, a lot of faith, and perseverance.
Overtime, healing came and other opportunities presented themselves. After buying my home an organization called Massachusetts Affordable Housing Alliance (MAHA) which help create the most affordable mortgage in the state of Massachusetts (the same mortgage product I used to purchase my home), asked me to share my story on homeownership. I would share my story of how building wealth was helping me heal and overcoming the guilt of being a single parent. I shared my story at community meetings and larger community events and this became my calling. In 2009, I became a volunteer and an affordable housing advocate with MAHA. I loved their mission; they have helped over 21,000 low-to-moderate income homebuyers (predominantly families of color) become first time home owners in a state where only 30% of homeowners are people of color compared to 70% of Caucasian families. Today I am the vice president of the MAHA board. In 2016, I was the campaign treasurer for a very successful campaign that led Boston to adopt the Community Preservation Act (CPA) (a campaign MAHA brought to the forefront). In 2017, I left my corporate job, and became the first Director of Community Relations for the new Community Preservation Act for the City of Boston.
The Emerging Leader Award from Citizens’ Housing and Planning Association (CHAPA) in December 2018
Today, I feel truly blessed. I just turned forty and God has molded and strengthen me in ways I could have never imagined. I have a fulfilling job, I am the founder and president of my own professional organizing consultant business that I run part-time, and a mother to an amazing seventeen-year-old. I am unapologetic about who I am and where I am because through it all I have remained loyal to myself. I know that in every situation where I have remained stagnate God was teaching me and preparing me for the next level. I know now that life is a series of risks and you face those risks on a daily basis. Sometimes you fail and most times you will succeed, the questions to always ask yourself during those failures are “what have I learned?” and “What was God teaching me in that moment?”
To the young women starting out on life’s journey or those hitting reset to start again, I say to you “Be fearless and unapologetic!” Life indeed will bring you opportunities. Believe it, claim it and let God do it!
I will entitle this post OWN YOUR GLOW because that is exactly what I am learning to do more and more everyday. Accepting myself for who I am is not so much a struggle but it's a daily conscious effort. It is so easy to compare myself to other people my age, to even the person other people expected me to be, or even compare myself to who I think I should have been by now. But I understand that my accomplishments or skills don't define who I am but they're just a by-product of who I am. In coming into acceptance of who I really am, I had to research God's version of me. It occurred to me just today that all of who I am is the Great I AM in me, so all that I am is of God and what He says I am.
Hopefully all the I am's didn't confuse you but pretty much I'm God-breathed - and birthed into existence so everything that flows out of me is just an extension of Him. It is so vital to come to terms with yourself and not the self that people are trying to create you to be. I don't care if everyone in your family is an academic scholar, or if everyone is taking a certain path. What God has called you to do and be is not based on what everybody else is doing.
Sometimes I felt like the black sheep because I was the only artistic one and I was the only free-spirited dreamer that wanted to dress up for runways and take pictures. To most, that can seem like it's so vain and superficial but they never understood that this was God's way of communicating with and through me. See, I believe God communicates with us in different ways. (He just will not communicate with me through music because Lord knows he did not give me a voice sounding as the beautiful birds.) He probably won't communicate with me through numbers either, that's just not how He wired me. He wired me through an interpretation of colors and prints, lines and designs, body shapes and styles. Therefore, this is what I have to embrace and use to communicate with Him and with others. It's as if trying to speak French to someone who speaks Spanish- there's just no communication there! Understanding the language that God has created me to speak made me aware of who I am and made me secure in what He wanted me to do even if I was doing it alone or without the approval and support of others.
Styled by Miss Phee
For some time, (and even now honestly) I still have moments where I am afraid to own my glow. I would sometimes hide or stifle my full glory because I think that maybe if I post a video of me dancing, which I love to do, or doing poetry or a video talking on a topic then people might perceive me as 'doing too much' or fake or trying to tap into an arena that's not mine. When in actuality these are interests and talents of mine but because of what other people may think, I dim the glow. So that's why I said earlier it is an everyday commitment to own my glow.
Styled by Miss Phee
But I have come a long way because now I don't apologize for what I'm doing. If you don't understand my mission that is okay. I am so burdened with it that I know it has to be from God and as long as it's God-approved, I don't need anybody's approval. Things and people that mattered in the past that I allowed to hinder me from owning my glow, I realized they don't matter right now. So for that reason the people right now who “threaten” my glow I just have to think in the future they too will not matter. So I quickly get over this fleeting fear or need to conform and just
DO ME BOO!
Miss Phee Styling her client
But wait, then I'm now mistaken for being stubborn and maybe too confident! But hey, as long as I'm pursuing alignment with my Creator, I learned I cannot be worried about anybody else or their mama. Suffocating my true self has been so daunting. Now I know that in the pursuit of purpose and living the Abundant Life, I have no choice but to shine and own my glow - which is accepting ALL of myself for who the I AM says I am.
Hopefully this encouraged you to negate the naysayers and silence the stereotype. My heart for you is to be aligned with our Creator, seek validation from Him alone and perform for your Audience of One. I do not care if all your siblings are lawyers, doctors, Indian chiefs. If God has called you to fry chicken for homeless people - you better fry the mess outta those chicken okay! And I don't care what physical flaw you have that you're letting govern your life. If one leg is longer than the other honey, you betta walk with a fly limp! OKAY!!
Love, Light & Abundant Life,
Learn more about her missions at
IG : @missphee31 // @ourdailyT
Youtube : MissPhee31
Want to know more about Miss Phee? Read her bio below!
How can you know the giver of life but not understand the value of life? How could a church girl who professed the love of God also deal with suicidal thoughts? For as long as I could remember, Sunday’s were sacred days. Sunday mornings were filled with the aroma of fried plantains and dumplings sizzling as sweet melodies of upbeat gospel music vibrated throughout the house. Mom’s hands were always occupied as she ironed church clothes for my five siblings and I after braiding our hair into intricate patterns that told stories.
It felt like I lived two lives; one inside the church and another outside of the church. Eventually these false dichotomies merged into a li(f)e I could not maintain. For a long time, validation came from friends and the opposite sex. I believed I was valued based on people’s perception of me. My worth camouflaged with the compliments others gave me. I slow-danced with this exchange as it both built me up and tore me down. The truth was—I did not feel good enough and I was lost. The void of not truly knowing my identity filled my world with darkness. This pain is one that many individuals experience. This is a pain so deep; it often screams, “don’t live.” On two occasions I was engulfed by such sadness I thought of ways to end my life. In this dark place, I chose to hold onto faith—the belief that there was more to life than what I knew. I remember the day I became free. A mountain-sized cloud was permanently destroyed. My freedom came when I experienced a personal relationship with God during my college years. I learned that I could cry out to Him, ponder life with Him, and find truth in Him. I was slowly learning to love myself. I began to encounter more people that brought the love of God to me through an invitation to talk over coffee or a phone-call to pray with me.
I met with God daily and I encountered what it meant to be alone without feeling lonely. Prayer, worship, and the Word of God were my daily bread. I made peace with my soul’s cry for acceptance. I realized I did not have to run away from myself. I learned to love myself because God loved me, so much so, He sent His only Son to die for me and redeem me. As my relationship with God evolved, He began to show me that it is not just experiences that bring fulfillment but it is the heart’s condition. My confidence is in knowing God could take my heart of stone and make it into a heart of flesh—a heart that will follow the beat of His heart for this world (Ezekiel 36:26).
Thus far, I have come to understand this—I have not arrived. I want God to always have access to my life; never again hardened by life. I have learned to exchange my broken identity for God’s certain identity. I desire to return to Eden—to return to my original design. As I seek more of God each day, He continues to save me, not just from the issues of this world but also from myself (self-indulgence, inadequacies, selfishness, loneliness, bitterness, self-righteousness, etc.). While my journey towards self-acceptance was forged in a sinful and broken place, I want to remain breakable in the secret place with God; I want to remain malleable in His hands. This is freedom. This freedom is not just for me but it is for you too— we are created to Be. Be healed. Be loved. Be confident. Be whole. Be free.
Pray this prayer with me:
I am free. I am created for greatness. I stand out on purpose. I am reclaiming the wholeness of my identity. I come against every lie that made me feel bound. Jesus Christ saved me. I am free to walk confidently as an empowered [woman/man] of God. Man did not give me my identity. Man cannot take my identity. Life flows in me. I am free.
Every now and again, I’m a great listener. Then there are times I can be a good hearer…and that’s not always a good thing. Have you ever had one of those friends that can’t multitask but still try while you’re talking to them? Then you ask them their opinion and you realized they weren’t listening but they heard you? I’m guilty. I can be that friend at times, but I’m learning to stop what I’m doing and be a good listener, not just a hearer. I’m sure you would find it annoying to repeat yourself more than once. Besides, there’s only one person I know that can multitask and be great a listener at the same time and that’s Jesus.
When I pray and I just need God to intervene, I say things like, “Lord, give ear to my prayers”, “Father, hear my cry this morning” or “Father, I know you’re listening”. Here on earth, just hearing someone talk is not the same as listening. However, when it comes to communicating with our Heavenly Father, He desires to engage in conversation with you. He wants to sit on the throne of your heart and listen to your problems. He wants to hear your voice. When I think about the words “Listen” and “Hear”, there’s a distinct difference between the two.
Listening is when someone is giving ear to what you’re saying with purpose; they are giving you attention (by also studying your intention).
Hearing is to be aware of a sound or noise; putting your ears to use.
These definitions are so rich because the way God works through them is beautiful. In 1 John 5:14 AMPC version, it says, “And this is the confidence which we have in Him; that if we ask anything according to His will, He listens to and hears us”.
To know that the Lord finds our prayer requests so valuable is already a great thing. Not only does He find it valuable but we have His undivided attention every time we pour our hearts out in prayer. To be even more specific, He listens and hears the quick prayers we say before we go to work, the ones we say as we’re falling asleep and never finish, the long prayers we say when we finally make time for Him and the prayers we don’t feel like praying but we do it anyway. Remember that our prayers are not in vain; even when we don’t have any words to say, the Holy Spirit intercedes for us. Even in those moments our Heavenly Father hears those groans (Romans 8:26). Let’s not forget that God sent His only son to die for us, tore the veil that separated us from Him, and gave us His spirit so we don’t have to feel like we serve a God that’s far away. (Acts 17:24 and John 14:15-17 ) Who do you know would sacrifice their life just to hear your voice?
If you’ve ever felt like God is not listening because you’re not seeing your prayers being answered, please know He is listening with purpose and intent to see you through. He hears the tone in your voice, the cries before the words, the groans, and the silence. He knows the condition of your heart as you pour it all out. So before you believe that God is distant or ignoring you, always remember that He can both listen and hear you, no matter what you’re going through. Even in your silence, He understands.
I pray that in your quite time with God, that your heart and mind is in a position to receive Him. I pray that you can quite your racing thoughts, doubts, and worries for a few minutes to hear from God. I pray that even in your silence or as you speak to the Lord that remember He’s listening and He hears you. Lastly, I pray that you always remember the kind of God you serve and always know that He will never leave nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6). It’s when we forget the kind of God we serve, is when we lose sight of what He has done and what He can do. That’s when the enemy makes us feel that God is distant when He’s closer than we think. Stay close 💕
That word “process” is literally the very thing that made it hard for me to go after my purpose. I never wanted to go through the process, I never wanted to do the work to see it. So what does God do to teach me about process? He tells the love of my life that it’s time for him to propose to me at time where I was between transitioning jobs. So I have to find a new job while planning a wedding. By the grace of God I got one and reality set in that I’m an engaged woman and I’m about to be someone’s WHOLE wife. Now I was in the “process” of planning a wedding and I experienced a stress that I’ve never experienced before. The kind of stress that you can’t even explain to people. The kind of stress where you don’t realize you’re snapping on people and making easy fixes bigger than they need to be. The kind of stress where people ask if you’re excited and your answer sounds like you’re about to call it quits. I wanted to give up, it was too hard, too much weight, and so much that needed to be done in so little time.
I STRONGLY disliked this process. I tried to convince David for us to go to the pastors office and get married in there lol...no judgement to those that have by the way. I knew that I wanted a wedding and that option was easier than planning a whole wedding. Process is like that long exhausting lecture class that you don’t want to take but you have to in order to learn something new, apply what you’ve learned and see the results or fruit of your effort in the form of a letter grade.
Going through a process is not a matter of waiting until it ends, it’s bigger than you. It’s how you navigate your way while you’re in it. As for me, I allowed stress, doubt and the opinions of others to take the wheel.
But even within those negative moments, that’s when God stepped in and allowed me to see how He can turn things around for His glory. I was able to see why He chose that time, that day, that man, that family, that location, those friends, those family members, that florist, that baker, that DJ, etc. Everything was for a reason and if anything changed, I wouldn’t be able to say it was the Lords doing.
I pray that as you’re in the middle of your process, whatever that may look like, endure with patience, endure with a goal in mind, and endure with faith.
Don’t panic. I’m with you. There’s no need to fear for I’m your God. I’ll give you strength. I’ll help you. I’ll hold you steady, keep a firm grip on you. Isaiah 41:10
Hey y’all! It has been way too long since I’ve written a blog post and two months since I’ve been married. It has been going great so far and I’m learning more about myself more than I was when I was single and engaged. It has its bumps of course but, if God wasn’t the foundation of our marriage, we would be a wreck by now lol. Overall, I want to thank those that still read my previous posts and checked out my website while being MIA for a little while. I find that being married and balancing my passions are not easy yet, I push to use any downtime I have to either write, dance or read. However, that’s a blog post for another day lol, now let’s talk about me and my husband's first trip to Dallas, Texas!
As soon as we got to the airport, God did not waste any time showing off and allowed us to see Him work on our behalf. When we were next in line the woman behind the desk said, “I know you guys! You just got married right?”. David and I looked at each other because we didn’t recognize her. She continues on and says she saw us on Facebook through a mutual friend of ours that attends the same church she does. So as we were in the process of getting our flight tickets, we bumped into a little problem that almost made us miss our flight. When David purchased our tickets, he used my new last name, Thibault. Since my drivers license still says my maiden name, they couldn’t allow me to get on my flight. The woman behind the desk that we just met says, “I believe God sent me here at this exact time just for you guys”. If we went to any another desk, we would’ve had to pay between $200-250 to get this fixed. I thank God for His grace and covering. He cares about so much that He places someone at the desk at the right time to help us. God you’re so good!
So we finally caught our flight right in the nick of time and it was a pretty good flight. Once we landed, we picked up our rental car from Enterprise and drove to the hotel. We picked a navy blue 2 door Dodge Charger. It was pretty dope and David was more excited about it than I was lol. Unfortunately, I wasn’t feeling well since we left Boston and found myself chugging down NyQuil and DayQuil during the entire trip. Nonetheless, that didn’t stop me from taking pictures in the chilly Dallas weather.
As we cruised around, I couldn’t help but admire the tall and large buildings in south Dallas. If anything, that was my favorite part about being there. They are as beautiful in the day as they are at night. The architecture and color schemes are so creative. It seemed like the further we drove into Dallas and through other towns, the more complex the buildings were. It was such an amazing view everyday.
The main reason as to why we traveled to Dallas in the first place was for a good friends wedding, Christine and Samuel Ogbonna. I had known Christine since my high school days because we both attended a summer program called Balfour Academy. We reconnected when I decided to ask her to host my dance concert at my church and she said yes. From then on we became friends that encouraged each other often, called or text just to check in and talked about our goals and passions with a common one being blogging(Christine's blog). During my wedding process, I would call her nervous and freaking out about stuff and all she had to do was start off with “Tiff” and that’s all it took for me to know that she was about to check my WHOLE life lol. Friends like Christine are hard to find and I deeply appreciate you, your honesty and love. Now, as for this wedding….….it was a TURN up!
The ceremony was lovely and Christine was a stunning bride. Her dress was absolutely perfect and her hair and makeup was beautiful… as you can see of course. Now the reception y’all…all I have to say is attending an African wedding is an amazing experience. With this being my first one, I didn’t want to miss a thing. What I loved the most about Sam and Christine’s wedding was how much love was in the room and how it felt like you were part of the family. We danced non stop…as a matter of fact, we danced before the food was served LOL. I had such an amazing time and it was an honor to be a witness of their union. #OGBONNAFOREVER
On Sunday, we went to Norma’s Café in Dallas and their breakfast was SOOOO GOOD! I’m talking fried chicken and waffles, biscuits with gravy, meat lovers omelette, and fluffy French toast. When we walked in...well we barely walked in because the line was out the door; that’s how you know it’s a great place to eat if it's packed and customers are willing to wait for a seat. I totally recommend this place, they were very warm and welcoming.
After breakfast/brunch, I got us an appointment to a spa called Pure Spa. Let’s back track real quick, David and I got settled into our apartment during our honeymoon week so we never actually traveled and did any “couple” things together like a spa date. Now, that’s why we went to Pure Spa and y’all, I literally don’t have much words for this spot. I completely fell in LOVE with Pure Spa. They had robes and slippers in our lockers, a Waterhouse lounge with a hot tub, a eucalyptus scented steam room and cushions. They served you either water with cucumbers, hot tea or a bottle of complimentary wine. It was SO amazing and the staff was so hospitable. We never been to a spa before so I was super excited…like SUPER excited. David and I got a couples deep tissue massage. It was great and we felt amazing afterwards. During my session, I kept making my masseuse laugh because I’m ticklish. She asked me if I’ve ever been tickled as a kid and I told her yes I have. She said that’s why this specific part of my back is sensitive because whenever someone comes to tickle you, your body tenses up and it now becomes a habit to tense up that area. I had no idea and now I don’t want to tickle kids anymore lol. I can say that I definitely learned something new.
All in all, this trip was so much fun and I can’t wait for the next one. A few lessons I learned was to make sure I officially change my last name lol, check to see if the places we planned to go to are open during holiday weekends, and don’t assume what the weather might be because of what the state is known for. We figured that it would be pretty hot in Texas and we were freezing lol so lesson learned. For our first trip together, we had a great time and we plan on going on many more trips together. Oh and before I forget and don’t say I didn’t tell you but, whenever you’re in Dallas, please go to Lockhart Smoke house. Don’t say I didn’t tell you and be ready to have a moment of silence after that first bite. Thanks for reading and don't forget to subscribe!
I use to ask myself every other day, “What’s wrong with me?” It either started with me over thinking a conversation and wondering if I offended them (which still happens) and/or when I struggle to be social at social events, gatherings etc. I’m always self searching and I like to be in tune with who I am. As I continue to learn, accept and understand something new about myself each day, I find MYSELF beating up MYSELF for being MYSELF because others don’t understand. It doesn’t even make sense, especially when you’ve gone through a WHOLE process to FINALLY accept that ONE flaw you have. You find peace, you’re happy and it only takes ONE human being to tear it all apart with their words. That’s like taking on a new habit and someone says “Are you sure that’s going to help?” Now you being to rethink why you’re even doing it in the first place and you’re back to square one. Listen....well read closely lol don’t give anyone room to shake your progress and don’t give anyone room to define who you KNOW you are. It takes work to be the woman ( or man if a man is reading this) you’re trying to become, it doesn’t happen over night. It takes discipline, decision making, confidence, and most importantly trusting in God. We don’t have time to be apologetic for who are. Love it or change it, don’t hate it. “The fear of human opinion disables; trusting in God protects your from that”
New blog post coming very soon....like sometime this week
Waterfall coat: @missguided (no longer in stock but still have similar styles) : @neenapeaphotography
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I was talking to a friend of mine a few weeks ago and she was sharing with me some lessons she learned. One of the them being; learning to express her feelings to anyone that offends her. It sounds like an easy thing to do but, if you’re anything like me and my friend; we tend to stifle our feelings just to keep peace. We stifle and we suppress until we express it in the most unhealthy ways that tends to hurt people close to us and give others a wrong perception of who we are. I remember last year having to talk to an old friend that hurt my feelings and it was so nerve wrecking for me. I literally hate having those type of conversations but I knew that I did not want to walk around with the weight of words I’ll never get to express. When the conversation was finally held and over, I wasn’t happy with the end result. However, reflecting and thinking about it every now and again, I’m happy that it happened. You see, these uncomfortable situations we find ourselves in can be a turning point more-so for us than for the individual that was involved in the situation. It’s all a matter of what we choose to take away from it. We can take away growth, self reflection, lessons, new habits and so on. Sometimes those situations can be the turning point of our life where we fight to be better and stronger people, because we don’t want to find ourselves in similar situations again. Not only that but become a better friend, co-worker, sister, daughter, girlfriend, wife etc. because of it.
As I am writing this, there are still some people I need to WISELY approach at the RIGHT TIME about how I feel. I say “wisely” because it depends on the level of pain that was caused and if you can bear it until the right opportunity comes up to talk about it. You don’t want to lash out due to the build up and you get nothing out of the conversation. You should gain something beneficial, edifying, or lessons through those hard conversations, especially the ones that will cause the most hurt. I’m not trying to tell you all not to “feel”, please do, don’t suppress it. It’s a matter of learning when to transition from being emotional, to asking God questions like: “What can I take away from this Lord?” or “What’s the lesson I’m suppose to learn?”. I believe this is a level of spiritual maturity and a beautiful level at that because the focus and outcome you desire has changed. Its not about seeing who’s right or wrong but what was God doing in that season.
There are two people in my life I have to talk to. I’m not gonna lie to y’all, I am nervous. However, I’m happy that I had the time to heal, pray and process everything. That’s why I can openly say this conversation is going to happen because my mindset is renewed and I will not allow the convo to be steered in a negative direction. If it does, I will take what I can from it. I have the choice to walk away with peace or fear, and I choose peace.
I pray that you are encouraged and pushed to communicate and not stifle your feelings. Depending on the level of weight that conversation may hold, I suggest you forgive, pray and heal. Then, you will gain the confidence you need to approach that individual. You’re in my prayers! Love you and God bless💕
Let’s get straight to it....We are not gonna say “New year, New me” or “my new year resolution is..” we are cutting ourselves and our focus short when we limit what can happen in a year. God wants to do a TON of things for us and in us and God cannot work if we are hoping for Him to help us reach a “New year’s resolution” when He can do so much more...all at once. So, let’s switch it up to “New Year, New Habits”. Let’s start making the action that is required of us a habit to reach our goals and not like it’s a finish line. It’s an everyday thing to renew your mind, your character, your skills and so on. Let’s make new habits ladies and let God work in us!
Hey ladies! I want to apologize for the last two months of being MIA. I will be blogging more about it soon but, let’s just say the devil tried and God handled it!
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In the past couple of years now, I have been on a journey of finding my voice and my view points on issues that go on in this world. As an artist, using my platform to spread love, peace and unity as the basis of my work, I wanted more depth and conviction to it. I was not satisfied with the surface level that I felt I was at. This process started with me examining my thoughts, my mind, myself and the things I deemed important and worthy of my time. At first, other people’s perspective were still surfacing. The things I no longer identified with, I laid aside. As I spent more time with my self, things began to filter out. I was able to see my true self. Even memories from my childhood, whether good or bad, made me who I am today. When these memories came to surface it was as if I was meeting my younger self again, introducing her to this woman I have become, who I am proud of. I knew in order to continue on my journey in life as a WHOLE woman, I needed to face my younger self and bring her along for this journey.
In my beginning stages of my professional work as a singer/songwriter, recording artist and an actress, it would be a false statement to say that everything was always great. That I had it all together, and had it all figured out as I pursue my passions in the entertainment industry.
I thought about the hundreds of other artist that were already out there. I was nervous because I thought I started too late. I did not even want to try to begin the process because I felt as if I would just be another number. But I could not run away from my purpose and my calling. Watching artist like Tori Kelly, reading about artist like Jennifer Lopez and many more; they never gave up despite what anyone told them. They remained consistent, focused and kept on going. It lit up a fire in me right at the edge of my surrender. Right when I thought I was not cut out for it. I was determined to be my best self. So I engulfed myself in learning about the music industry and music business. I began working on my brand, website, recordings and my performance skills. I even auditioned and was accepted into a conservatory program training in Music Theatre after being out of college for four years.
I know that there are no shortcuts and this is how bad I really wanted it. I surprised myself. I looked at the things I invested my time in, what I deemed important to me and saw that I was a true artist. I lived, breathed, and dreamed it. So my question for you is: How bad do you want it? How hard you will work to become your best self? Your best life is not in competition with anyone else’s, only in the pursuit of your greatest self. There will be times when people won't see everything that you're doing. There will be times people won't see everything that God is doing but, holding on to your faith, your hope and your optimism will determine the outcome. What I have come to find out is: It is all about perspective. The things we receive out of life are based on the thoughts in our mind. I choose to live my life in a very optimistic way. I would rather see the world through positive and pure eyes instead of seeing the world through a negative lens. As I continue with my everyday life, I know I am on the brink of greatness. When life tries to hand me some, I hand some right back and keep on going!
My name is Raquel Meraki and I'm a young woman who is on the journey of self discovery and independence.